Texting

Pass

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops - a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well.

At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a Pathan got on. Six feet four, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the conductor and said, "Pathan doesn't pay!" and sat down at the back.

Conductor didn't argue with Pathan, but he wasn't happy about it. The next day the same thing happened. Pathan got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the next.

This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Pathan was taking advantage of poor conductor. Finally he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff.

By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself. So, on the next Monday, when Pathan once again got on the bus and said, "Pathan doesn't pay!"

The driver stood up, glared back at Pathan, and screamed, "And why not?"

With a surprised look on his face, Pathan replied, "Pathan has a bus pass."

Relatives

Intelligence

A woman and man get into a car
accident. Both of their cars are totally
demolished, but amazingly neither one of
them is hurt.
After they crawl out of the wreckage, the
woman says, "Wow, look at our cars --
there's nothing left! This must be a sign
from Him that we should be friends and
not try to pin the blame on each other."
The man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with
you completely."
The woman points to a bottle on the
ground and says, "Somehow this bottle
of Scotch from my back seat didn't
break. Surely God wants us to drink this
Scotch and celebrate our good fortune."
She hands the bottle to the man. The
man nods his head in agreement, opens
it, and chugs about a third of the bottle
to calm his nerves. The woman takes the
bottle, immediately puts the cap back
on, and hands it back to the man.
The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"
The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just
wait for the police."

Blonde Jokes - Driving License

A blonde lady was driving along the highway when a blonde police officer pulled her over for speeding.

Officer: May i see your license?

Lady: what does it look like?

Officer: its a rectangular thing with a photo of you on it.

The lady looks through her bag and pulls out her compact mirror and hands it to the officer.

The officer opens it up and says 'if you had told me you were a police officer I wouldn't have pulled you over.'